Big Five and Denmark

Denmark: Basim – Cliché Love Song

I hate scatting. With a passion. Almost as much as I hate clowns, spiders, bigotry and the extreme right. My hatred for this stuff overshadows anything that this song may or may not be. Without it, I’d probably be hopping along in my seat. But now I can only resist the urge to throw things. I’m sorry, Denmark. 

Germany: Elaiza – Is it right

Oh, this is arty stuff with actual instruments, and a girl in very short shorts playing the harmonica. I’m not sure if I like the singer’s voice, but the song is fabulous, even though I’m not sure if it’s actually going somewhere. I get the feeling I should wear a big flowy skirt and just dance in circles around a room.  As such, with the absence of campfires, I’m afraid it’ll get lost in the other Eurovision violence. 

UK: Molly – Children of the universe

So, if Scotland votes yes on the referendum, how long before they take part in Eurovision and give the UK zero points? But this song should get points. I love it. All anthem-y and revolution-y, I’m a huge fan. Huge. You’ve heard it here first. I LOVE a UK entry. Let it be written down, put in stone, because it doesn’t happen much. Oh, she can screw it up of course, by thinking she’s at a concert as opposed to a television show, but the CD version will be played at top volume in this house and in our car. Come on, Eurovisionland, put that wind machine on and give those backing singers a couple of flags to wave! Power to the people!!

France: TWIN TWIN – Moustache

Is it ever a good idea when the French try humour? Well, yes, I loved Les Fatals Picards, even though I was probably the only one in  the world. Apart from they themselves. And I’m going to love TWIN TWIN. All they want is a moustache, is that so much to ask? (Well, since I’m asking, yes, it is, moustaches invariably make men look like creeps, and if my boys ever (try to) grow one I’m shaving it off when they sleep). Tell me, is it just me or is this faaaaabulous? 

Spain: Ruth Lorenzo – Dancing in the rain

Oh, well, this is a big contrast from the French song. Good though. And English, Spain? Really now? Are we going there? Is the world ending? Sorry, in all honesty, this is actually bloody fantastic. And moving. And if this gets a good draw… well, Spain is quite broke, aren’t they?... bugger. 

Italy: Emma – La Mia Citta

Its good. It sounds edgy. If I even have a clue what that means, at my age. But it’s good. And it scares me a little, which can only be a good thing for Eurovision. Pretty sure my wife will have an instant crush, which is generally also a good thing for Eurovision.

What is going on, are the Big Five sending the best songs of the night? Did they finally get the memo that making an effort is worth it (if not for them, then at the very least for us?).

I guess that’s it for the songs of 2014.

Who’s going to win? I have no fucking clue. Not us. But 2014 might just be a very good year.

(Be sure to remind me of that when some song I hate wins, and I throw a tantrum not seen since the Dima Bilan/Azerbaijan duet debacles).