Montenegro, Israel, Estonia

We’re kicking off the contest with Montenegro. Eurovision Queens like to believe that Eurovision is one of the reasons why Serbia en Montenegro split back in 2006. When a boyband from Montenegro won the national preselection (over a “qualitatively better” Serbian song) rumours of tactical nationalistic voting arose. Serbia & Montenegro then withdrew from the contest, only to split a month later. Not-Eurovision-Queens would claim that the withdrawal was one of the effects of the growing Serbian and Montenegrin nationalism, but they’re wrong. Obviously.
So now we get two countries for the price of one, and this year Montenegro sends us Stefan Filipovic with Zauvijek Volim Te (“never forget I love you”). Aw… isn’t that sweet.
You’ve got to love the clumsy straightboy dance moves Stefan is pulling off here. He’s hardly the first to manage this at Eurovision, one of funniest clumsy straightboy dance routines was –for me- FYR Macedonia’s Martin Vucic in 2005 (Specifically pay attention to his backing vocalists! Hilarious. And look how excited Martin is to be at Eurovision, you can just see him thinking “Wait till I tell the guys!”). Also a close contender in this category was Malta’s Julie & Ludwig in 2004, just look at Ludwig shake in the chorus!
Anyway, back to Stefan, he seems to have brought along his cousins and they look like they’re at a wedding aching to have a little dance but not yet drunk enough. Come on, this is Eurovision, give this guy something to do! Get him some costume changes or a juggling elephant.
This song is utterly forgettable, but I have a weak spot for Balkan pop/ballads/anything so it will have me (as probably the only person in Western Europe) swaying along.



Second in line is Israel. Hang on a second, Israel’s not in Europe. No, it’s not. That doesn’t matter. Israel sends Boaz with “The Fire in your eyes” . True to Israeli tradition, like everyone else they’ve ever sent before, Boaz sings the song in both English and Hebrew (treat yourself and look at the gorgeous Shiri Maimon in 2005 singing a gorgeous ballad in an even more gorgeous dress). Also true to tradition, they send some serious eyecandy (see Shiri Maimon, again. Can you tell I’m a fan?), and they do the trick with the singer with the androginous voice again (see David D'or in 2004… wait for the unintentionally hilarious moment where he switches from his countertenor voice to his normal speaking voice “Come on, everybody!”).



And now for something completely different: Estonia sends Kreisiraadio (Crazy Radio) with “Leto Svet”. They’re sending one of the more adventurous Eurovision entries, or at least it looks that way. Girls in gold bikinis? Check! Girls waving Estonian and –for some reason German- flags? Check! Weird guys who can’t hold a tune? Check! Eurobeat? Check! Slow-mo Riverdance? Check! Guy pretending to do unspeakable stuff to a piano? Check! Posters of cakes and is that an onion or a bomb? Check! Song sung in Serbo-Croatian in a sure-to-fail attempt to get the balkan vote? Check! This whole thing could be a sketch from The Fast Show. It’s a song and act that followed the “how to make a crazy Eurovision entry”-guidelines to the letter. Unfortunately for them, they’re not the only ones who had that idea this year, and the other idiots are better.


Next up: Moldova, San Marino and... Belgium.